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Shopping while we wait

January 20, 2010
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This waiting lark is beginning to drag already. At least if you’re pregnant you know how long the wait is likely to be.

I keep thinking at least we can use the waiting time to prepare for the baby’s arrival. We have plenty of time on our hands to buy all the things we’ll need, and read all those books on our list… But then around Christmas and New Year, internet friends of ours almost (almost!) had a baby placed with them. Unfortunately, that placement wasn’t to be and they’re back to waiting again, but they had less than a week’s notice about the whole thing. We’re so sorry they had to go through that, but it’s made us realise more than ever that this could all happen for us at any time. And with very little notice. (It’s also driven home the fact that nothing’s a given. Not until the birth mom relinquishes her rights and actually becomes the birth mom, not just the mom. But that’s a whole other post.) Which means we really should get ourselves ready.

So, queue the shopping!

We haven’t bought any of the big stuff yet. We haven’t decided whether to buy a cot/crib or a co-sleeper for by the bed, and I don’t think we’ll get a pushchair/stroller yet – we’ll use a wrap or sling to begin with. Once this storm leaves California behind – hopefully by the weekend – we’ll be heading out to the Fashion District downtown, & hunting out some good wrap material in the fabric shops there. I imagine we’ll need to get a car seat soon too, in case we have to travel to pick up the baby (not that we’ve actually got a car to put it in!).

A lot of the other bits and pieces have been bought or made though. These little cuties arrived this morning:

They’re made from organic cotton and organic soy, and they’re wonderfully soft. I want clothes made from this fabric! These are the tiny 0-3 month size. I have a fair bit of patience for sewing, but not a very good sewing machine, and trying to do hems on the 3-6 month size was bad enough. I decided to just buy the things we’ll need for the first three months. (I’ll be using the same fold-back-cuffs design that these have on anything else I make though!) I’ve bought the nappies/diapers (organic cotton Chinese tri-folds) and some organic hemp burp cloths too, which arrived last week, along with a baby brush & comb, and this giraffe:

It’s made from natural rubber and food paint, so safe to chew on. I think the squeek could get a little annoying, but I guess I’m just gonna have to get used to toys that make a noise. :) The brush and comb are generic baby ones; I’m not sure if we’ll need something different if our baby is African-American. We’ll need to learn a lot of new hair care techniques then, since we both have very fine, straight Celtic hair.

Our reading is coming on though. I’ve read The Baby Book pretty much from cover to cover, and last week read through The Vaccine Book. There’s a lot of info to take in there. Karl needs to read that one now, & then we need to go through it together & decide on which vaccines to get. We know that childhood diseases can be devastating, and that vaccines have done an amazing job of eradicating some of them (at least for those of us in the developed world), but vaccines themselves aren’t without their problems, so we’re going to decide on each one of them on it’s own merits. It seems more sensible than an all or nothing approach. Though having read the book, I’m utterly appalled at the vaccines that are grown in monkey kidney cells and fetal cow serum! Since that one’s just for a stomach bug, I think we’ll be giving it a miss.

This is another post for Mel’s Show & Tell. If I try to do something for this at least every other week, it’ll give me a reason to keep updating this blog, even though nothing much is happening!

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27 Comments leave one →
  1. pandabox33 permalink
    January 20, 2010 5:36 pm

    Cute PJs !!

  2. January 20, 2010 5:47 pm

    most sensible approach i have heard in regards to vaccinations in a long time! right on, i agree:) you are choosing and using things/materials that are so awesome! this little one is going to be so lucky to have you for a mum linda:)

    • January 20, 2010 9:15 pm

      Aw, thanks, Leslie! We’re definitely making sure we buy organic & natural stuff – baby skin is far too thin & delicate to risk anything else.

  3. January 20, 2010 7:14 pm

    The gowns are so cute. I imagine the wait is impossibly difficult to wrap your mind around because, as you say, at least with a pregnancy you know the timeline generally.

    By the way, Lindsay (Our Family Beginnings) has a great “matched and now you need stuff” shopping list. I linked to it from my left sidebar: http://ourfamilybeginnings.com/?p=2408

    • January 20, 2010 9:16 pm

      Thanks, Mel! I’d already found your link for that, & have been using it as my shopping list. :)

  4. January 20, 2010 8:29 pm

    those gowns are adorable, and they make diaper changes so easy! adorable giraffe too!

  5. January 20, 2010 9:26 pm

    I love the Sophie Giraffe. My store sells them, and I think they are wonderful…

  6. January 20, 2010 11:41 pm

    I’m sorry about the waiting. I can’t wait to hear all about it when it does happen!

    I love the clothes, so cute. I love the fact you are using hemp/soy/organic cotton fabrics. Giraffe is cute too :)

  7. January 21, 2010 3:11 am

    With you on the approach to vaccines (and should start reading into it!).
    Love the clothes, both the design and the fact that they are made of organic cotton!
    I am with you also in the need to get ready for baby, but at least as you said, I do know when it will happen. It must be very hard when you don’t know when, and when it can be in a very long time or tomorrow they can come knocking at your door. Hope your baby will come in perfect timing – not too long, but long enough for you to be able to get everyting ready for her/him.

  8. January 21, 2010 5:27 am

    OMG, those gowns are so adorable! And, that giraffe is precious.

  9. January 21, 2010 6:23 am

    I love those types of gowns. It really makes diaper changes easier, and these are so cute! I’ve heard great things about Sophie, too!

  10. christinambw permalink
    January 21, 2010 6:41 am

    I love the onesies…especially the bird one. So sweet!

  11. January 21, 2010 6:53 am

    I agree with Leslie that this is a very wise approach to the whole vaccine controversy. A word of advice … whatever you decide, keep it quiet (at least in the “real world”) because you’ll be harshly judged whichever way you go. Hubby and I took the same approach as you with our first child, and he had a VERY scary allergic reaction (huge swelling, seizure, etc) to DTAP, despite our minimalist approach to vaccines. You just never know, either way you go, what could happen. Good luck with a tough choice!

  12. January 21, 2010 11:57 am

    You’ve got some cute stuff. And it’s great that you’re reading up on babies and parenting issues.

    I was going to point you toward Lindsay’s post, but you beat me to it!

  13. January 22, 2010 4:30 am

    You are right, the waiting absolutely loses any luster after about a day. I was terrible at the waiting part, still am. We’re blessed to be matched now, but the waiting still stinks every day!

    Enjoy the shopping, love the Sophie!

    Happy ICLW and thanks for the kind words over my way!

  14. Ali permalink
    January 22, 2010 5:20 am

    I completely agree with your approch to vacination it seems the most sensible thing to do. Those onesies are too cute and I bet really soft and comfy too.

    Great choices :)

  15. Rach permalink
    January 22, 2010 6:41 am

    That Giraffe is absolutely adorable! I hope the timeline speeds up for you.

    Rach
    http://www.thegalwho.wordpress.com

  16. January 22, 2010 9:41 am

    Ooh. Cute onesies/gowns! I love them, especially the dandelion one. They’re so whimsical and sweet without being too saccharine, which can be hard to find with baby gear.

  17. January 22, 2010 11:39 am

    The onsies are adorable!

  18. January 23, 2010 1:32 pm

    Love the outfits. I hope your wait goes quickly.
    ICLW

  19. January 23, 2010 2:13 pm

    Good choice with the vaccines. Not to mention that not a single vaccine out there is vegan! We have avoided all of them with no troubles, but I agree with the pp who recommended keeping it out of everyday conversation.

    And adorable clothes. The giraffe is too cute! My oldest (7) still sleeps with his stuffed giraffe.

  20. January 25, 2010 7:29 am

    Oh those little outfits are just adorable!

  21. January 25, 2010 5:32 pm

    Those onesies are adorable… and I agree that sewing tiny things is nearly impossible (I’m a Costume Designer, and even I refse to make the teeniest sizes of baby clothes, lol).
    And I totally agree with your take on vaccines… weigh the pros and cons of each.

  22. January 27, 2010 5:53 pm

    It’s a great idea to get everything ready now! We didn’t–meant to, but didn’t–and then got the call and our son was born 4 days later! We pretty much lived at Babies R Us in the four days between match and birth, and we did manage to get enough stuff to survive for a bit, but it was crazy! But, I think I would have found it hard to have everything ready and waiting since as you say, it’s impossible to know how long the wait will be, so I understand waiting on some of the big stuff for now.

  23. May 5, 2010 12:04 pm

    Thank you for a great post. I came across your blog when looking for adoption stories. My hubbby & I are also awaiting for a match with a birth mom (we started our adoption process last September). So in the meantime I”ve been tempted to decorate the nursery, although my girlfriends reccommend to put a hold on any shopping or decoration until we actually get the baby (they say is for good luck…). I guess then, at least I will start knitting some baby clothing since it will my personal way of expecting him/her.

    By the way, I am also vegetarian and I agree with your approach to vaccination. However, I wonder if -as adopting parents- we can really manage the initial vaccination when the baby is born since at least in Florida, we don’t have full legal rights until 4 months after the baby comes home…can you recommend any book or article on that?

    I will be following your blog.

    Thank you,

    • May 5, 2010 2:50 pm

      Thanks!

      You should probably check with your adoption agency on that one. As far as I’m aware, in California, we become the official guardians of the baby as soon as the birth parents sign the TPR, until the point that the adoption is finalised. So we get to make the decisions about things like injections.

      The first few days or hours might be another matter though. For the first injections it’s something we’ll have to discuss with the birth parents (assuming we’re involved right from day one that is). For vaccinations, and everything else that’s done to/with the baby in hospital, you should try to discuss things with the staff there beforehand, if at all possible. Apparently, most hospitals these days are pretty good at respecting the adopting parents wishes. And, obviously, talk things through with the birth parents too, if you can.

      Good luck with your adoption. Hope your wait isn’t too long.

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